Everyone has heard of the horrors of going through a complicated divorce process, and we often are told to be careful while doing so.  What they often leave out is exactly what it is we’re supposed to be cautious about, and how to do this “being careful” thing to begin with if we don’t know?”.  After years of watching people go through the divorce process and carefully exploring the data afterward, these are some of the things we found that people really need to know when starting this messy process.

This Isn’t A Good Time To Hook Up With Your Lawyer

Sounds ridiculous, doesn’t it?  You’re going through one of the most painful, complicated experiences of your life and the first thing on the list seems rather apparent. The emotional roller coaster you’re on can compromise your ability to make smart decisions, and adding the charge of adultery to your case isn’t going to help anyone except your estranged spouse.  It’s generally wise to avoid having an intimate or romantic relationship with anyone during this period, just to make sure you stay focused and there’s no available leverage for use in the case.

Divorces Can Happen Cheaply If You Both Can Be Civil
Maybe your divorce isn’t a messy one, perhaps you both just realized it wasn’t working and it was time for you to go your separate ways.  If that’s the story with your divorce, you may not even need a lawyer or a drawn-out case, especially if there are few assets involved.  Mediation is available to work out the details of your divorce and is the cheapest process available.  The catch? Neither party can have lawyers in the room.  Collaborative divorce is a similar process but allows lawyers, therapists, and divorce coaches into the room.

Go See A Therapist Before, During, And After The Divorce
Through the whole process, you should be seeing a professional, even if you don’t think it will help you.  Therapists are experts at handling emotion, and it’s a good bet that you’re having quite a few powerful, and maybe even conflicting, ones during this process.  They can help you learn how to help your kids during this difficult time, how to manage your emotions and stay calm in court, and just generally how to relax through the whole thing.

Change Your Will
If you have valuable assets that are still set to go to your spouse, don’t wait to have those records changed, they need to be changed immediately.  You never know what can happen tomorrow, or in the next few minutes, so don’t let this critical thing get set to the wayside, make sure you find new beneficiaries before the divorce proceedings come to a close.

If Possible, Keep The Whole Situation Calm
It’s a difficult situation; there’s no doubting that, but if you can manage to work with your ex-spouse to help keep this whole process civil everyone involved is going to be happier in the end.  Your children will be less traumatized by the whole thing; there will be less overall animosity and a far greater chance that your future interactions will be more comfortable.  Sometimes you can just leave an ex behind, if there are kids involved this isn’t an opportunity you’re going to get for some time, so try to make it as easy as possible for yourself and them.

If you’ve decided to follow a divorce process that is best accomplished with the assistance of an attorney, pick up the phone and contact Sean Smallwood, P.A. He’s been serving clients with the messy process of divorce from his office in Orlando, FL for years, and is available to help you make it through  it with everything you deserve, including peace of mind.